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Why Must We Limit Ourselves?

by on August 7, 2014

I know romance is everyone’s dirty little secret. I see it when I’m doing book signings at book stores where if you ask patrons “do you read romance?” They shudder in shame and come up with a respectable genre like mystery or sci-fi or non-fiction war books. I did that at one time. For a long time I wouldn’t read female writers because of the books I came across.

But I have a dirty little secret for all of you… promise not to tell? They all have romance in them. Now they may not have a happily ever after, but every book has a touch of romance. Even thrillers, horror and contemporary fiction. Every genre has romance. Romance has the largest gross profit of all genres, so someone’s reading it.

Do I read romance? Yes, but I don’t limit myself to only romance. Or worse yet only interracial romance with black men and white women. Why would I do that? I love a good Sidney Sheldon mystery. J.R. Ward paranormal. William Landay wrote a great thriller called Defending Jacob. And don’t even get me started about the wonderful books written by the Luscious Literaries.

In this world we’re thrown into boxes. She’s a mom, she’s white, she’s married to black guy, her dad was German. All these things are true, but very little describe me. Yes I’m white, married and gave birth to a child. But is that all that I am? No, not by a long shot. Heck, even saying my dad was German cuts out about seven other nationalities that make up the mutt like nature that I am.

Do I only watch movies or TV shows that depict my life? No. My life, first off, is boring. Secondly books, movies, and TV are the way we escape into another world. Who wants to vacation to the same place every year? Sure there’s tradition and we love going back to that one spot, but if I only went to a cabin in the woods I’d only know one lake. I’d only know the animals of that area and the food in that area. The world is vast, why limit yourself?

Next time you automatically say “I wouldn’t read that” based on the genre alone, take a moment and hear what the story’s about. You never know you may just find a whole new world where you can live without limits.


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  1. Great post and so true. There are so many stories to be read and told. It would be a shame for anyone to deny themselves the pleasure of those journeys.

  2. NancyS.Goodman permalink

    Reblogged this on Rakes Rogues and Romance and commented:
    I’m loving this post today. Why? Because it speaks to the heart of what I hear and see when I tell people I’ve started writing gay romance. They giggle, or type LOL, give me the winky emoji and give me “oh, wow.” and then never mention the subject again. I will admit to not reading in other genres, simply because I had a preconceived notion of what I thought it was. I didn’t read vampires until I was told about JR Ward and now I love her and Sara Humphreys, I didn’t read Civil War romance until Cindy Nord and Ihonestly, I don’t know how I picked up Male/Male romance but I did and I was swept away by the romance i discovered in the pages.
    So much so , that I wrote my own, Rescued, which is coming out August 19th, from Loose Id.
    For another viewpoint from Susanna Kearsley, on celebrating ALL Romance, you might want to check out her article here:
    We, as romance writers suffer enough snobbery, eye-rolling and isolation from outside the genre. it’s nice to know we all have each other’s backs.
    Have a happy!!

    • So true. the first m/m piece I picked up blew me away. The romance was the same as any other. I have my first f/f coming out soon too. 😀

  3. Well said. No limits means more growth.

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