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New Year’s Resolution – The Bathing Suit

by on January 11, 2013

As a forty something year old, I’ve learned that New Year’s resolutions don’t often work because they’re unrealistic. There are things that simply can’t change because the calendar has turned a new page. No matter how badly we want them to.

Take for example my loathing of exercise for the sake of exercise. I never saw the point of it.

You see, I’m one of those individuals with a naturally high metabolism. Through no work whatsoever on my part and a combination of genes, my body burns calories at a higher rate than the average person. When I was younger, I never had to exercise and still maintained a four-pack abdomen.

Fast forward twenty years and three children. And that vision of heaven is gone.

Gravity is a hellavu thing!

So in order to pull what little hindquarters I have up from the backs of my knees, I have embarked on what I’d hoped was a realistic exercising journey. And here’s my story to date –

I like to dance.

So last Saturday, I set up my living room for a Bollywood dance aerobics class. I didn’t have to leave home and I got to wear my favorite leisure pants with the white paint splatter on the bottom. I start off really good. I’m moving. I’m grooving. I’m dancing to the beat. Sing with me now….

Then, the musculature between my individual ribs begins to contort and tie into a modern day Gordian knot. My stomach clenches into a sudden crunch that bends my knees to the floor. My head follows with a thud. All 600 or 800 (depending on your biology teacher) of my muscles and tendons scream in unison – This heifer done lost her damn mind and must be stopped!

Though I can’t see anything because my eyes are closed shut from the pain of the cramps and spasms coursing through my body. I hear the footsteps. And I gotta tell ya’, my hubby missed his romantic hero moment. Instead of swooping me into his arms and soothing my aches, he stood there laughing. And then he called the three children so they could laugh as well. After they got themselves together, they uncrinkled me from the floor and put me on the sofa where they left me with a glass of wine and a bottle of ibuprofen.

Why do I have the same plan for tomorrow night? My goal is to be a hot looking older woman out by the pool at RomCon 2013 in June. Not that it matters – laughing husband, light of my life.

I’d just like to be looked at as someone other than so-and-so’s mom. Is that so wrong?

Another woman asking the ‘Is that so wrong’ question at the onset of the New Year is Darcey St. Claire. To phrase it appropriately, her question was – I’m single, so what’s the harm? Check out Cheers to find out Darcey’s answer.


Cheers (FINAL)

As a successful Sales and Catering Manager for the posh Hayden Court Hotel located in New Orleans’ famed French Quarter, Darcey St. Claire is absolutely thrilled to be working on New Year’s Eve. The commission and bonus she’ll receive from the two day Guidry Construction event will not only fund her spring trip to New York City, but buy a cute pair of shoes for the plane ride!
Her enthusiasm quickly turns to barely disguised irritation when Vincent Guidry arrives hours early for his scheduled check-in, demanding access to his suite. After he slashes the budget for the event, not even the crystal blue eyes of the former quarterback can quell the anger surging in her chest.
That is until he walks into the Chat Noir where she is trying to regroup after her irksome day.
In the private enclave known as the Cristal Room, Vincent willingly lights up Darcey’s New Year’s Eve and may have lost his heart in the process to the young woman who isn’t looking for anything serious.

Cheers is a contemporary sensual short story available on Amazon, All Romance and Smashwords.

Let me know about your resolutions and if you’d like some help in keeping them. I’d sure like some follow up about my bathing suit status!


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  1. January 2013 Status Update « valloryv

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